OPINION
OPINION
Does Ms. Jenson’s Class Need the Cooties Vaccine?
A disastrous, dastardly, doodoo disease has reared its dumb head in our homeroom. Surely you know what I am talking about. I speak of the catastrophic, cantankerous, c… C… I can’t say it… COOTIES!!! Oh. God… The disgust. The horror. It scares me so. Ever since that day. The day that Mary-Elise came to school…
Petition to Restore Purity in Children’s Literature
Dear Parents, I am writing today with grave concern about several so-called “classic” children’s books that have infiltrated our libraries and classrooms. Beneath their colorful covers lie dangerous messages meant to indoctrinate our children into radical ideologies, immoral lifestyles, and even witchcraft. Please read carefully and stand with me in demanding that these books be…
Review: A Light at the Bottom of a Well
A Light at the Bottom of a Well Sight Without Seeing 2025 GENRE: Rock LABEL: Dead Oceans REVIEWED: October 17, 2025 On their sophomore album, the soulful folk-rock duo reaches new sonic heights that are counteracted by awkward and blundering thematic subjects. Sight Without Seeing, the project of youngsters Jeremy Beck and Dominic Greer, brings…
Guest ViewPoint
Guest Viewpoint: Brett Kavanaugh On White Claw
Look, I’m a beer guy; I like beer. It’s always been my beverage of choice. Tailgates, the big game, a much-needed refreshment after working out with the guys — I like beer. At least that’s what I thought. See, I was at this wild rager of a party last week. The theme of the night…