GUIDES
GUIDES
Zam Polling™ the 2024 Election
ABSTRACT The polling division of the Zamboni surveyed the Tufts student body on who they intended to vote for in the 2024 presidential election and, crucially, how much money it would take to make them vote for the other candidate.…
Best Places on Campus to Have Sex
The map above has been annotated for your personal, or perhaps small group, enjoyment. Yes, all these places have been tested thoroughly by Zamboni staff. Yes, we used protection. No, we do not condone any love-making in Goddard Chapel (of…
Funding Your SMFA Degree: Seven Steps to Divorcing an Ivy League Student
STEP 1: Picking a targetYou aren’t just looking for any genius, you’re looking for a future member of the bourgeoisie. Luckily, there’s an easy tell: ask your prospect their thoughts on “The Matrix” (1999), “American Psycho” (2000), or any David…
