A staggering ten of the fifteen members of the Department of Religion E-list jumped at the opportunity to spend time with beloved professors during an evening of spellworking and enchantment. However, according to an anonymous student report, the night took an interesting turn when they were instructed to show up to the Chemistry Building.
“As we approached Pearson, some of [the professors] got uncharacteristically anxious,” one student said. The attendees were left in confusion as they crowded around a laboratory door as the department chair Arthur Utz spent the next three hours performing routine experiments. As Utz poured chemicals from the beaker into a jar and gently mixed, the religion professors gasped and gaped. Others reportedly clutched rosaries.
At the end of the show, student attendees were left with mixed feelings. One witness reports that an unnamed religion professor frequently invoked the Inquisition, while others sought to form a conciliatory council. Despite the unusual evening, the consensus remains: the Department of Religion is still a much-beloved part of the Tufts.